Would you ever be in a committed friend with benefits situation?

Sex, trust and fun, without the money, stress and expectations.

I think it'd be ideal.

I'm older, my kid is older, I don't need or want all the things people dream of together that get complicated.

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deathfairy ·

I would, but it takes work to keep that string free. Emotions are deeply complex and ppl eventually start to attach, so unless both parties are always open and honest, talking things out and checking in with each other, it would eventually become entangled.

ScreamingFox · 41-45, F

@deathfairy i think there can be strings, you could be tied to each other. But maybe not living together, no joint bank account or bills together. No expectations to go to every family gathering.

Everything would just be from the heart.

MagnumPI · 51-55, M

@ScreamingFox Well said

deathfairy ·

That sounds ideal, because let’s face it. Sex is sacred and an extremely deep exchange between two people.. You wouldn’t be able to untie what happens during that moment easily anyway. Ppl leave each other physically long after they are no longer having sex, but they continue to remain entangled.. @ScreamingFox

ScreamingFox · 41-45, F

@deathfairy SEX IS SO SACRED. I couldn't get my ex to understand it was very expressive of my love for him. He just thought I didn't love him because we weren't on the Verizon family plan together.

To me it's not about contracts and enmeshment.

It's about what's shared within the bounds of two hearts. Being committed to that and not building some bullshit prison to live in because that's what society expects.

I'd love to adore one person forever. To know them inside and out up and down lol but I also want my own space, my own thoughts and to not compromise who I am because that's what we think love is.

deathfairy ·

Yeah, exactly.. That’s why I said it wouldn’t be easy to just have casual sex for long.. without the expectations.. Because sex is not casual in any way shape or form. No matter how much it is being made to seem that way in today’s world.. @ScreamingFox

ScreamingFox · 41-45, F

@deathfairy yeah I don't want casual sex. It is empty and I don't want to risk disease.

Maybe there's another word for what I'm describing lol

deathfairy ·

I mean, a friend with benefits can meet you at the space you are describing. As long as both of you are on the same page and their perspective is like yours, to be committed sexually without pushing boundaries of other spaces in your life. That level of honesty and respect can be and should be the norm.

So I guess it doesn’t matter what we call it, I know what you are looking for, and you will know the right person when you meet them. @ScreamingFox