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Try this book: "Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life : Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships"
by Marshall Rosenberg.
By reading through, and then using your issues to practice the methods, it should become much easier to resolve your issues.
It does require self-awareness. If either of you has difficulty identifying and naming his/her own emotions, it might be helpful to see a qualified psychologist. If the psych can show clear empathy for both of you in the first session, they're likely to be the right person; if they can't, find someone else. Learning a mindfulness meditation practice can also be very helpful, eg, Vipassana, Dzog Chen, or Zen.
If one (or both) of you has a neurological issue, like undiagnosed ADHD, mild bipolar, etc,, that may need to be diagnosed and addressed.
Depression, anxiety, stress, addiction... these kinds of issues also need to be dealt with.
by Marshall Rosenberg.
By reading through, and then using your issues to practice the methods, it should become much easier to resolve your issues.
It does require self-awareness. If either of you has difficulty identifying and naming his/her own emotions, it might be helpful to see a qualified psychologist. If the psych can show clear empathy for both of you in the first session, they're likely to be the right person; if they can't, find someone else. Learning a mindfulness meditation practice can also be very helpful, eg, Vipassana, Dzog Chen, or Zen.
If one (or both) of you has a neurological issue, like undiagnosed ADHD, mild bipolar, etc,, that may need to be diagnosed and addressed.
Depression, anxiety, stress, addiction... these kinds of issues also need to be dealt with.