Would you let a son or daughter over 20 still stay at your house or would you start mentioning apartments and other places for them to be looking at?

I’d want them moving out and help financially.

Yes if they can financially

i like to think they can stay as long as they life.. if and when i ever have one

They can stay as long as they are helping out with household chores and pulling their weight. And I would encourage them strongly to save their money so they can eventually get their own place.