9 Early Frontrunners For The 2028 Democratic Primary
Hunter Biden: The perfect heir to the family legacy, only with more F-words and crack.
Kilmar Abrego Garcia: Few candidates have been able to build as much support among the Democratic base as this wife-beating illegal immigrant.
That one bronze statue of the sassy black woman from Times Square: Still smarter than Kamala Harris
Angel Reese: The party could use someone with her track record of beating popular white people.
Volodymyr Zelenskyy: He has valuable experience in running a country and costing American taxpayers hundreds of millions of dollars.
Luigi Mangione: Insiders say he would be a killer candidate.
Stephen Colbert: Word has it his schedule is wide open.
Elmo: The party has a strong history of success when it comes to nominating puppets for president.
Joe Biden's Autopen: It ran the country before, and it can do it again.
Kilmar Abrego Garcia: Few candidates have been able to build as much support among the Democratic base as this wife-beating illegal immigrant.
That one bronze statue of the sassy black woman from Times Square: Still smarter than Kamala Harris
Angel Reese: The party could use someone with her track record of beating popular white people.
Volodymyr Zelenskyy: He has valuable experience in running a country and costing American taxpayers hundreds of millions of dollars.
Luigi Mangione: Insiders say he would be a killer candidate.
Stephen Colbert: Word has it his schedule is wide open.
Elmo: The party has a strong history of success when it comes to nominating puppets for president.
Joe Biden's Autopen: It ran the country before, and it can do it again.