Just Where Is The Microphone?
Only slightly tongue-in-cheek.
Referring to the Forum title illustration, where would I find the microphone?
I ask not only because I don't know anyway*. Also by the strange behaviour of those users who are terrified to switch the damn' things off even in social gatherings.
- Some hold the thing flat on the palm, level with the chin, arm half-extended. Walk Like An Egyptian? They do look as if making an offering to the gods. Perhaps the Roman god Janus? (Pun intended, albeit a rather oblique one, on a certain person's name...).
- Some hold it at the side of the head more or less as if a normal landline telephone handset.
- Still others sit with it flat on the lap while they face chin-up forwards, so have to talk LOUDLY. The louder their surroundings the more likely this behaviour. Daftest example I saw was a young woman sitting on a bench on a busy, noisy railway station platform, looking as if trying to talk to the driver of a train standing, engines idling very loudly, about four lines away.
- A few use a gadget stuck in the ear, so look as if talking either to themselves or to everyone else in the street.
..
*My portable telephone's microphone is in its front, so you hold the instrument like a landline handset, and can speak normally, not declaim to everyone within fifty yards..
Referring to the Forum title illustration, where would I find the microphone?
I ask not only because I don't know anyway*. Also by the strange behaviour of those users who are terrified to switch the damn' things off even in social gatherings.
- Some hold the thing flat on the palm, level with the chin, arm half-extended. Walk Like An Egyptian? They do look as if making an offering to the gods. Perhaps the Roman god Janus? (Pun intended, albeit a rather oblique one, on a certain person's name...).
- Some hold it at the side of the head more or less as if a normal landline telephone handset.
- Still others sit with it flat on the lap while they face chin-up forwards, so have to talk LOUDLY. The louder their surroundings the more likely this behaviour. Daftest example I saw was a young woman sitting on a bench on a busy, noisy railway station platform, looking as if trying to talk to the driver of a train standing, engines idling very loudly, about four lines away.
- A few use a gadget stuck in the ear, so look as if talking either to themselves or to everyone else in the street.
..
*My portable telephone's microphone is in its front, so you hold the instrument like a landline handset, and can speak normally, not declaim to everyone within fifty yards..

