Someone please tell me if I’m overreacting

Most of us have something dark in our past. Admittedly that's a bit gross, but it was ten years ago and he now realizes how inappropriate it was. And he opened up to you, which shows he's grown. It does give off some ick but if you love this man and he treats you well, it'll just be another part of the foundation your building.

Well this must be bothering you because it’s the second posT, but with more info.

He’s not 18 anymore. Sure there’s no way of knowing who will get attracted to whom but at some point with life experience and maturity one weighs if it’s worth pursuing. Thats the bigger question to me.

Did it happen once? Ongoing? All things that speak to judgment, albeit one of an 18 year old.

Only asterisk here is if what he did was consensual, and if she was old enough to know. If not; it’s a much bigger issue.

Just consider that it's his past. At least you know how open minded he really is despite his struggles. The feeling you have is similar to when a woman finds out that her significant other is bisexual. Now you have to worry about him hanging out with certain crowd.
It's a good thing he opened up. You can legitimately question him if he spends too much time with a family member. It's better than being blindsided.

Yeah... you're definitely over inflating this.

So what if he has history??? Most people do the older you get. The question is how you deal with it.

He's going to go out in the world and see other girls that he finds attractive (and not necessarily family members), you need to find a way to accept that you can't prevent this from happening - or him potentially sleeping with them... but you can have and set boundaries with him "If I see/hear about it, we're done" might be appropriate for you.

Just imagine for a second he had not told you this ..

Hey, I hear you, and I want to start by saying.

You are not crazy.

It makes complete sence that you feel torn. On one hand, his honesty and deep regret are huge - that takes courage, and it shows he knows what he did was wrong. But on the other hand, your fear isn’t just jealousy. It’s about safety, boundaries, and wondering if this was a one time mistake from years ago or part of a deeper pattern. That is a valid concern, especialy when family dynamics are involved.

You dont have to decide everything today. It’s okay to say, “I believe you’re sorry, but I need time and clarity before I can feel okay again.” If he’s serious about this “repentance process,” encourage him to turn that into action - idealy with a therapist who understands trauma and boundary violations. You deserve to see concrete steps, not just tears.

Please be gentle with yourself. Feeling shaken is a normal reaction to heavy news. You’re allowed to take space, ask hard questions, and protect your peace while you figure out what you need to feel safe in this relationship.

Most important thing is. Youre not alone in this!

get away from him

There's two separate issues here... His reaction to it and yours.... Don't confuse them together...i think your reaction may be a trifle over done... His past sex life is his, just as yours is yours.... As regards him I think some counselling to come to terms with it would help

Sorry if you disagree

Ewwwwwwaaaahhhhhhhhhh no theres no excuses here like he had SEX with his family i dont mean to be insensitive but you need to see how unhealthy that is incest is illegal for a reason

What's the big deal ??
Crying?
Come on
He wasnt crying then. Was he. 😄
It's not that big of a deal.

Everyone has a past. Sounds like he regrets it and knows it's not the way to go.

Fortunately what you do when you are 18/19 does not define you for the rest of your life. I'm sure we have all done things at that age we are not proud of.

I don't have a solution for you but you are not overreacting.