When a table gets rude with me, I can’t hide the irritation in my voice and face for the life of me.

I hear yah. I don't go out anymore but I always treated the waiter waitress kindly and usually were treated in kind. That's what increases tips. I had one incident years ago at a Ruby Tuesdays where we placed our order and for over 2 hours the tables around us were served and new customers seated in their place. All the while the waiter kept refilling our drinks. At the 2 and half Mark I'd had enough. I went to podium and told the manager he had no good reason to be in business and how long I'd been there. He looked at some list and called our waiter over who saw me and said hi your meal is coming right out. I looked at the manager this won't do you can pay for it.
I have not been in any Ruby Tuesday since.