Why does someone who seems to look down on my always find time for me and help me?
I'm a PhD student at a university and I kind of don't understand the behaviour of a senior co-worker towards me. He's a very good researcher in his field, but sadly not in my project. Anyway, I still know him as a lecturer, so I asked him for help in my project some time ago when I was facing difficulties with communication with some people.
His reaction was kind of harsh, he told me "I can't stay in academia when I find such problems difficult and should work in a fabric or something and that due to my personality he's not even surprised I'm facing these problems now" and many similar things. However, he still spent 3 hours talking to me and what he said actually did help me (and then he was happy for me).
And when later on I asked him about my results cause I didn't understand one thing, he also found time for me but said "I set up all of my models wrong and would not fullfill his requirments for a PhD if I were his student and that I have to enforce my own ideas in the project more cause otherwise I will keep doing shitty research". But he still talked to me, I got an idea for my new study and he even said that "During PostDoc I will do it hopefully all better." And then he even asked about how my other research projects are going, when I will finish and what my plans are.
From his harsh reactions, he obviously doesn't think I'm a capable student and kinda looks down on me. But he still finds time for me, even though I'm not his student and he's not obliged by contract in doing so (and when I tell othe poeple in my group that I'm meeting him, they are surprised because normally he rarely finds time for anyone).
So why does he still find extra time for me when he obviously doesn't think much of me?
PS-sorry for grammar, english is not my first language.
His reaction was kind of harsh, he told me "I can't stay in academia when I find such problems difficult and should work in a fabric or something and that due to my personality he's not even surprised I'm facing these problems now" and many similar things. However, he still spent 3 hours talking to me and what he said actually did help me (and then he was happy for me).
And when later on I asked him about my results cause I didn't understand one thing, he also found time for me but said "I set up all of my models wrong and would not fullfill his requirments for a PhD if I were his student and that I have to enforce my own ideas in the project more cause otherwise I will keep doing shitty research". But he still talked to me, I got an idea for my new study and he even said that "During PostDoc I will do it hopefully all better." And then he even asked about how my other research projects are going, when I will finish and what my plans are.
From his harsh reactions, he obviously doesn't think I'm a capable student and kinda looks down on me. But he still finds time for me, even though I'm not his student and he's not obliged by contract in doing so (and when I tell othe poeple in my group that I'm meeting him, they are surprised because normally he rarely finds time for anyone).
So why does he still find extra time for me when he obviously doesn't think much of me?
PS-sorry for grammar, english is not my first language.
26-30, F
