Why do people treat masochism as if it's a disease or some form of insanity?
Why don't they accept that it's a PERSONAL CHOICE?
61-69, M
This post may contain Mildly Adult content.
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VTDestiny · 22-25, M
I don't think it's any of those things. You can't exactly choose what turns you on sexually. Just like how you can't choose your sexual identity.
You are who you are in this world, and at least in my opinion you shouldn't be treated as lesser than others or as if something's wrong with you over things you can't control.
When it comes to sexual identity you shouldn't be forced to repress who you are.
And, when it comes to what turns you on you shouldn't be shamed for it. You can't be held responsible for what turns you on, only what you do as a result of it. For example if you have extremely sadistic sexual preferences you can't be blamed for that, but you can't exactly just go around causing others suffering, humiliation, or pain just because you get off on it either.
Everyone has to learn how to deal with who they are in a way that's healthy for not just them, but those around them too. You shouldn't be labeled as having a disease or a form of insanity for something they just found out one day did/didn't turn them on.
You are who you are in this world, and at least in my opinion you shouldn't be treated as lesser than others or as if something's wrong with you over things you can't control.
When it comes to sexual identity you shouldn't be forced to repress who you are.
And, when it comes to what turns you on you shouldn't be shamed for it. You can't be held responsible for what turns you on, only what you do as a result of it. For example if you have extremely sadistic sexual preferences you can't be blamed for that, but you can't exactly just go around causing others suffering, humiliation, or pain just because you get off on it either.
Everyone has to learn how to deal with who they are in a way that's healthy for not just them, but those around them too. You shouldn't be labeled as having a disease or a form of insanity for something they just found out one day did/didn't turn them on.
Scribbles · 36-40, F
Because most reasonable people are alarmed by anything that involves someone engaged in a self harming behavior and would want to make sure that the person receives therapy if applicable. People react the same if someone has sadistic tendencies as harming others is very alarming behavior too.
I understand that a huge variety of sexual preferences, orientations and some sexual disorders exist. Some are harmful and some are harmless. The best way to discover which is which is sometimes via therapy.
I understand that a huge variety of sexual preferences, orientations and some sexual disorders exist. Some are harmful and some are harmless. The best way to discover which is which is sometimes via therapy.
ArishMell · 70-79, M
@Scribbles Therapy surely assumes somebody has already judged the behaviour as harmful and needs treating?
Therapy - what sort?
Judged - by whom, how, against what criteria?
You also need consider what sort of harm - and who are "reasonable people" anyway? I don't like bondage or oral sex - so would I be "reasonable" therefore to say they must be wrong?
Clearly it it is wrong to act against others without their consent, or downright illegally.
An act with sexual overtones on oneself is autoerotic but usually harmless (though there have been fatal accidents with certain acts).
A act against oneself that is wilfully injurious may not be sexual at all. Sometimes it is a cry for help for a background problem (as with teenagers starving or cutting themselves, often through being bullied by peers or parents).
However, most sexual activities are between consenting adults even if not all are to our individual sexual tastes.
It is the result of the behaviour that determines it as harmful or harmless, and if harmful, appropriate treatment might help; but otherwise trying to assess someone's nature by "therapy" would claim there is likely to be something wrong with practically everyone in the world.
Therapy - what sort?
Judged - by whom, how, against what criteria?
You also need consider what sort of harm - and who are "reasonable people" anyway? I don't like bondage or oral sex - so would I be "reasonable" therefore to say they must be wrong?
Clearly it it is wrong to act against others without their consent, or downright illegally.
An act with sexual overtones on oneself is autoerotic but usually harmless (though there have been fatal accidents with certain acts).
A act against oneself that is wilfully injurious may not be sexual at all. Sometimes it is a cry for help for a background problem (as with teenagers starving or cutting themselves, often through being bullied by peers or parents).
However, most sexual activities are between consenting adults even if not all are to our individual sexual tastes.
It is the result of the behaviour that determines it as harmful or harmless, and if harmful, appropriate treatment might help; but otherwise trying to assess someone's nature by "therapy" would claim there is likely to be something wrong with practically everyone in the world.
Scribbles · 36-40, F
@ArishMell I'm not trying to kink shame.
Therapy does not mean there is something wrong at all. You might do therapy because you want to understand yourself better. Therapy might helps clients uncover strengths and learn new skills that will allow them to deal with challenges that arise in life...such as the challenge of if people are worried your masochism is insanity or a disease as the poster mentioned. Life is hard sometimes. Lots of people struggle with other people's personal choices. My sister in law says she's currently talking alot with her therapist to figure out how to talk to family on her side to stop bullying her about having children. She doesn't want children and they can't seem to accept that.
Perhaps it's helpful to have someone to talk to who might be less judgemental or might be able to determine some way to help, or if there is anything to be concerned about or not. etc. Therapy can be helpful sometimes.
That's all.
Therapy does not mean there is something wrong at all. You might do therapy because you want to understand yourself better. Therapy might helps clients uncover strengths and learn new skills that will allow them to deal with challenges that arise in life...such as the challenge of if people are worried your masochism is insanity or a disease as the poster mentioned. Life is hard sometimes. Lots of people struggle with other people's personal choices. My sister in law says she's currently talking alot with her therapist to figure out how to talk to family on her side to stop bullying her about having children. She doesn't want children and they can't seem to accept that.
Perhaps it's helpful to have someone to talk to who might be less judgemental or might be able to determine some way to help, or if there is anything to be concerned about or not. etc. Therapy can be helpful sometimes.
That's all.
smiler2012 · 56-60
ArishMell · 70-79, M
Many people have an aversion to sexual preferences that are legal but not their own, but thinking them a disease shows only ignorance.
I would not think it a "choice" though. I have no idea why people are masochists or enjoy other predilections, but those seem something we develop but might choose to ignore or suppress.
I would not think it a "choice" though. I have no idea why people are masochists or enjoy other predilections, but those seem something we develop but might choose to ignore or suppress.
Mikemcneil · 61-69, M
Would you say the same about sadists? Who gets to draw the line? Can a masochist legally consent to being murdered?
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ExtremeNext · 31-35
smiler2012 · 56-60
@ExtremeNext there is an old saying it takes all sorts to make a world
ExtremeNext · 31-35
@smiler2012 I know weirdo's everywhere
GerOttman · 61-69, M
people make personal choices all the time, then other people make their own personal choices as to how they respond. someone chooses what to do and someone else chooses how to react. So long as no one is hitting anyone, I'm fine with it!
TexChik · F
Someone’s idiosyncrasies is another’s mental illness .
AthrillatheHunt · 51-55, M
Good question .