I have it on good authority that you’re a square

Well hmmmmppppfffff I can stretch into a rectangle just FINE mister man!!

I’m a regular at the salty spitoon

I'm more of an oval

I have it on good authority you can't ride a bicycle

I'd like to know the source. 😒

I’m here, I’m square, get used to it.

You people outside Flatland wouldn't understand

I like to think of it more as a parallelogram

For the hundredth time, yes! Now quit trying to shove me into round holes! 🙄