I Fight Depression and Loneliness Everyday

Well, I don't know if am a wolf, but..I like to think of it when am down aND depressed. I was having my good days streak for like a month...But again.got dragged back into this wormhole. It sucks to be like this. And I have tried so much that I wanna give up now. But no point in that too. I just can't accept it..Even though have been lonely and by myself since my childhood. No love or any other feelings from anyone. Feels like I don't belong here and question why have I been born. I wanna cry..But eyes are all dried up. I cry though from inside. But...I just can't accept my fate and myself. Can't love myself.
I don't know anymore what to do, whom to go asking for help and why am I alive.
😞😞