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People with depression, how you feel right now?

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Honestly, I am struggling with motivation and I am isolating. I've cut a lot of people out of my life because I don't want to suck them into my state of dysfunction and dysmoria. I'd love to have some energy to accomplish my goals, but it's hard. I keep procrastinating on everything. I put on a fake, yet fragile smile for strangers. I come on here to encourage other people struggling with the same things for my own selfish reasons. I usually hide my anhedonia and forge on. In private, I completely melt down.