I Battle Depression

Is it wrong to want to feel like a good person who's worthy?
I tried for years to love myself but people keep punching me down.
I'm so scared I'm staying in a relationship that'll end me. I feel like I can't say or do anything right. I feel like I want to die. I feel horrible. And I can't talk about it to anyone even the person I love can't tolerate me and my feelings anymore.
I'm exhausted I just want to end everything.