I Battle With Depression and Anxiety

I want to feel alive again, like my life means something. But I don't really see a reason in life anymore. I feel like I am drowning in darkness, suffocating in depression. My mind is overworking causing me to panic. It feels like the walls of life are closing in, getting ready to crush me. I want to feel something again, but all I feel is numb, lifeless. I just want to sleep, but I can't even do that. I'm sinking into the void of nothingness with no way back up. If I sink any further then I am done for, but maybe that will be a good thing. Maybe I should just let go and quit fighting. Let the darkness swallow me whole. Let the walls close in. Let my mind turn off.

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lovingdead · 31-35, M

Letting go is not the answer...I can attest to drowning, treading water for what seems like forever, not knowing what way is up, every person drifting past, wondering if they'll stay...

nekogirl · 22-25, F

@lovingdead Letting go seems to be the only answer. You can only hold on to something for so long before your strength starts to waver. But eventually it will give out and the only thing left to do is let go.

lovingdead · 31-35, M

@nekogirl I get that, but it depends on what you are letting go of....just giving up, and yielding to the darkness is not good unless you are talking about sunset, laying out and looking at the stars.

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nekogirl · 22-25, F

@lovingdead Letting go of all the pain I endure. Letting go of the life that hates me so. Letting go of it all.

lovingdead · 31-35, M

@nekogirl any plans on rebuilding? Grabbing something different?

nekogirl · 22-25, F

@lovingdead I am tried multiple times but it seems like every time I rebuild, it gets knocked down again.

lovingdead · 31-35, M

@nekogirl to make a diamond you need pressure and heat, a seed needs it's insides ripped out to grow a tree, a butterfly must face the dark and become goo....before it gets its wings...

Do you like music? Cardboard castles by watsky

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nekogirl · 22-25, F

@lovingdead Sometimes music is my only escape.

lovingdead · 31-35, M

@nekogirl did you listen to the song?

nekogirl · 22-25, F

@lovingdead yes I have heard them before.

lovingdead · 31-35, M

@nekogirl what kind of music do you like?

nekogirl · 22-25, F

@lovingdead It really just depends on the mood I am.