I Am a Teen With Depression

I had a pretty traumatic childhood which led to my anxiety and depression now. When I was 6 yrs old, I found my neighbor after a failed suicide attempt. I had gone over to see if she wanted to play with my sister and I , only to find her on her bedroom floor. I saw the cuts, knife and blood. She looked so lifeless, but I saved her by finding her. Even though this is a seemingly happy ending, I have flashbacks as nightmares that keep me up and cause my anxiety and depression to get overwhelming sometimes. Life is ironic. . .