I Battle Depression

I'm looking for somewhere I belong, just the hope of it really. Where a troubled heart can find peace and relax into a purpose. Where there are answers. Instead it feels like I’m in a maze. The walls are too high, the passages too many, the hurdles too foreboding, and I'm too damn tired. I don’t know where to go, with each wrong turn I lose a bit more hope. The walls are the same, there’s no hints, no lessons that can be remembered. If I fail, I’m back to where I started. And the ghosts are always with me. I try to run from them, shut them away, but I can’t escape them as if they were attached to me with a rope. Sometimes I can outdistance them but when night falls they always sink back in.

I'm searching for myself, but where to look when introspection yields naught but ghosts? People naught but lies, fronts. Experiences naught but pain. Myself and where I belong seem to be located together in the middle of the maze. I’m trying God, I’m trying . . . but I’m lost on the fringes, the walls are indistinguishable, and my time and hope are ticking away.