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Queendragonfly · 31-35, F
Yes. I have it. It goes under social anxiety but for me, the anxiety is the fear of people putting me in danger. Not just being looked at or judged, but injured, killed even.
And it's very subconscious. It's not me walking around actively thinking "oh no they will kill me" it's more like an underlying fear. And my body reacts like I'm in serious danger sometimes when I'm in public. Sometimes even with my partner.
I'm still figuring out how it works to be honest. I didn't know it was this bad until I started therapy and we started digging in what my anxiety really is.
It's a bit easier online as it's anonymous, I can just block if something feels wrong, but too much online interactions will activate that fear response in me. Especially after someone has been rude to me. Then I almost wanna delete my account. But I have trained myself to not escape. This is exposure therapy for me.
And it's very subconscious. It's not me walking around actively thinking "oh no they will kill me" it's more like an underlying fear. And my body reacts like I'm in serious danger sometimes when I'm in public. Sometimes even with my partner.
I'm still figuring out how it works to be honest. I didn't know it was this bad until I started therapy and we started digging in what my anxiety really is.
It's a bit easier online as it's anonymous, I can just block if something feels wrong, but too much online interactions will activate that fear response in me. Especially after someone has been rude to me. Then I almost wanna delete my account. But I have trained myself to not escape. This is exposure therapy for me.
Casheyane · F
@Queendragonfly Do you still make friends then?
CrazyMusicLover · 31-35
There are two types: one is fear of being seen as inadequate, stupid, inferior...basically fear of humiliation, embarrassment and social shame
another is paranoia that someone poses a real threat to you, so you fear that someone might scam you, rob you, steal your stuff or worse, hurt you physically
I have a mild form of it and mostly the first type. Rather discomfort than real fear. I just have thoughts that if whatever I do wrong or fumble too much in front of someone else they think something like "omg, she's so dumb".
another is paranoia that someone poses a real threat to you, so you fear that someone might scam you, rob you, steal your stuff or worse, hurt you physically
I have a mild form of it and mostly the first type. Rather discomfort than real fear. I just have thoughts that if whatever I do wrong or fumble too much in front of someone else they think something like "omg, she's so dumb".
Casheyane · F
@CrazyMusicLover I have moved on from worrying about whether they think I am dumb to being annoyed why they are dumb or act dumb. From worrying if they like me to stepping into a room and asking myself if I like them.
Choose yourself over them. And perspective will change too. Experience helps, especially when you realize people are more selfish than they show. Who helps you the most is you.
It worked for me.
Choose yourself over them. And perspective will change too. Experience helps, especially when you realize people are more selfish than they show. Who helps you the most is you.
It worked for me.
CrazyMusicLover · 31-35
@Casheyane It's not mutually exclusive. You can have demands both on yourself and others.
Casheyane · F
@CrazyMusicLover If you have good support system, sure.
But not all are privileged. Sometimes, waiting on others to act leads to disappointment. And one becomes stronger and more capable to do the parts of many to get things done and move forward.
But not all are privileged. Sometimes, waiting on others to act leads to disappointment. And one becomes stronger and more capable to do the parts of many to get things done and move forward.