Today was not a good day.
Today, my online therapist not only canceled our 4th session last minute, but she stated she has significant health issues and that she is leaving the company and to find a new therapist. I do not blame her for needing to do what she needs to do for her health, but this means I have to start over from the beginning telling someone else about my problems. I’m not even sure they will understand like she did. Not all therapists I’ve had in my life have understood me, and when I finally found one that seems to understand, she has to leave.
Not only did that happen, but I also had an argument with a friend that should never have happened. It was a misunderstanding and it lead to tears and me still trying to explain myself. I’m not even sure she completely understood, and I can’t bring everything up again in fear of starting it all up again. She got upset over something that wasn’t meant to offend her, and it all got blown out of proportion.
If I could replay the day, I wouldn’t have even answered the phone, and allowed her to leave a message, and waited until my boyfriend was awake so we could both call her and discuss plans for the day. Instead, I answered the phone, and then I went to wake him up when she told me not to…and somehow that upset her because she told me to let him sleep. Then, he was half awake and asked her why we couldn’t do her son’s birthday on his actual birthday on Wednesday. Well, her son works Wednesday and doesn’t get home until late. So that upset her, especially with his tone of voice since he wasn’t quite awake…and she was considering just not coming to see us today. That’s what started the argument, and like I said, none of it should have happened. Needless to say, we all apologized later, and we played out DND game, and plan on having a gathering for her son tomorrow…but I’m still very much high strung and trying to fight off a headache from all the crying from earlier.
My anxiety is very high, and I had to try to act normal all day despite all the emotional issues I’ve been experiencing. And granted, my friend has been through a lot as well. She tried to say that I never see what other people are going through as well, but that’s not true. She recently lost some family members, and she said stuff about it, and she’s been going through a lot of physical and mental pain.
I wish there was something I could do to help, but I feel powerless as there isn’t much I can do but listen. However, she hasn’t tried to talk to me about it until now, to my knowledge (because apparently people try to say things to me and I don’t hear them, so I’ve been told—but I don’t miss things on purpose if that’s the case, as I’m very empathic and in tune to helping and nurturing others). I have good intentions. It bothers me when I’m told that I don’t listen. It also bothers me when people think I don’t understand.
Not only did that happen, but I also had an argument with a friend that should never have happened. It was a misunderstanding and it lead to tears and me still trying to explain myself. I’m not even sure she completely understood, and I can’t bring everything up again in fear of starting it all up again. She got upset over something that wasn’t meant to offend her, and it all got blown out of proportion.
If I could replay the day, I wouldn’t have even answered the phone, and allowed her to leave a message, and waited until my boyfriend was awake so we could both call her and discuss plans for the day. Instead, I answered the phone, and then I went to wake him up when she told me not to…and somehow that upset her because she told me to let him sleep. Then, he was half awake and asked her why we couldn’t do her son’s birthday on his actual birthday on Wednesday. Well, her son works Wednesday and doesn’t get home until late. So that upset her, especially with his tone of voice since he wasn’t quite awake…and she was considering just not coming to see us today. That’s what started the argument, and like I said, none of it should have happened. Needless to say, we all apologized later, and we played out DND game, and plan on having a gathering for her son tomorrow…but I’m still very much high strung and trying to fight off a headache from all the crying from earlier.
My anxiety is very high, and I had to try to act normal all day despite all the emotional issues I’ve been experiencing. And granted, my friend has been through a lot as well. She tried to say that I never see what other people are going through as well, but that’s not true. She recently lost some family members, and she said stuff about it, and she’s been going through a lot of physical and mental pain.
I wish there was something I could do to help, but I feel powerless as there isn’t much I can do but listen. However, she hasn’t tried to talk to me about it until now, to my knowledge (because apparently people try to say things to me and I don’t hear them, so I’ve been told—but I don’t miss things on purpose if that’s the case, as I’m very empathic and in tune to helping and nurturing others). I have good intentions. It bothers me when I’m told that I don’t listen. It also bothers me when people think I don’t understand.
41-45, F
