Upset
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Here is me

I have what is called comorbidity. I suffer from alcohol use syndrome and Complex Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome. The CPTSD is from prolonged physical and emotional child abuse. As it turns out, I drank to become numb from the PTSD. So, I am overcoming two brain disorders at the same time. I am in therapy for the PTSD. I will always have that, but the therapy is teaching me how to slow down and react to it, rather than proact to it as I used to. I also went through outpatient treatment for alcoholism, attend at least five group therapy (A.A.) meetings per week and have been sober for just over four years. But my family continues to reject me, preferring to define me by my past, rather than spending time with me and getting to know the person I am now. It just gives me one more struggle to cope with until I learn to overcome it and just stop trying to bring them along as I move forward in my recovery and therapy. It really, honestly hurts to get the worst stigma from my own wife and children.
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Iv been there.
It’s horrible.
I could only advise to “grieve” the relationship that didn’t turn out to be as expected and gave you pain instead.
I had to do this.
My mom finally understood why I broke down when I did this.
Essentially I had to let go. And accept it’s gone.
The bond I have now with my family is one of like friends. Or just some people I know.
I feel like an orphan at times. But I’m glad I did that. I’m glad I let go.
Northguy1 · 56-60, M
@BlackUnicorn Thank you. I need to do this, too. It just interferes with my recovery and is toxic to me. What I feel sad about is that they didn't give me a chance, and I'm really liking the person I'm becoming. I really am. They're going to miss out on the dad I always wanted to be for them.
@Northguy1 you will always be there dad brother son etc
You can’t afford them more opportunities to keep you at level one.
You are trying to spiritually, mentally and emotionally evolve.
To go up a level and be who you were meant to be.
Love will find you again. They will find you again.
Iv sent you something in your inbox