I don’t get why it’s so hard

The love I want seems so hard to find. I know it seems cliche to say but people don’t value anything real anymore. Nobody values talking to each other as we used to. Working things out. Actually enjoying one’s company.
All I want is someone who makes me not feel alone. And makes me forget about how bad the world is. I just want someone who I can cuddle with and can’t keep their hands off me. Someone I can share my day with and not be chastised for wrongs. Just listened to. Someone who’s actually appreciates me and helps me out. I always give to those I’m with. But it always turns one sided every single time.
How hard is it to find someone who will love me the same I want to love them?

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ViciDraco · 41-45, M Best Comment

It's a really hard problem because people just have difficulty connecting deeply these days. A hundred shallow connections but nothing deep. We've grown afraid of deep because deep means risking pain and hurt. And so many of us are already in pain and hurting. If we take the risk but the other person doesn't, we're going to hurt more. If we take the risk and the other person cheats or leave or abuse, we hurt more.

We've become a society where its easy to connect with everyone but near impossible to trust anyone. And that lost trust is behind so many of society's ills these days. Including our shared loneliness.

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londonbr1dg3 · 26-30, F

@ViciDraco oh absolutely I agree it isn’t the only contribution. But it is in fact not normal; least not good to have access like that it’s not normal, and it’s more harmful than many this day and age want to admit.
Men are absolutely wired to look at women. That’s just a scientific fact. And I will agree it’s been a “problem” for generations. But the human brain make and female is not ment to be stimulated as much as we are. We’re supposed to be bored. So we can become creative and/or be forced to make real connections. Or self reflect a lot more than we allow

ViciDraco · 41-45, M

@londonbr1dg3 I mean, define normal though. As a species we are not born with clothing. At some point, wearing clothing was not normal. That's so long ago that we don't really know what the social dynamics were then, but there had to be some dynamic. We did not invent clothing for modesty because we didn't really have that concept. Clothing quite literally began as armor - against the cold, against the rain, and so on. Our natural state is to be fully nude, so that means the stimulation we experience from nudity today is somewhat artifically created. What stimulates eventually adjusts to new cultural norms over time.

And after writing this all I think I realize you meant stimulated by social media. A constant distraction that pulls at our attention. To that I do agree. Too many threads at once 😅

londonbr1dg3 · 26-30, F

@ViciDraco lol it’s okay!
Yes I ment over stimulated with social media. There’s always a new trend. A hotter guy/girl, a new party, new music, a new photo, new etc…it’s not good for us to be constantly stimulated is what I meant

Yes we are one of the few that started wearing clothes which I agree. But I mean not normal for us in the sense of just having the constant access as easily as we do..:

OogieBoogie · F

Ive discovered that we all feel and do 'love' our own way.

Its not just about love languages and all that, its about how our brains got wired, our damage, our own frailties etc.

Its a nice desire to want, but I think its a near impossble expectation.

Love isnt just a feeling, its also a skill.
Wanting it isnt enough, unfortunately 🫤

And it needs both to be skilled at it.....one isnt enougn☹

GoFish ·

they are still out there ☺

Ryanoliver2011 · 31-35, M

I feel the exact same way. These days everyone seems to just want sex while claiming they want a real relationship…

londonbr1dg3 · 26-30, F

@Ryanoliver2011 situationships is what they want

Ryanoliver2011 · 31-35, M

@londonbr1dg3 no. They want sex without having to admit that, that’s ALL they want lol. Like don’t get me wrong sex is great but without love what’s the point? Maybe I’m just old fashioned lol idk 🤷‍♂

IM5688 · 70-79, M

I have always wanted to find those same things your looking for in a partner. It's too bad that I am more than twice your age. I think we would have made a good couple.

1490wayb · 56-60, M

that is a crowded boat...you far from being alone

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