Finding love again

I more or less believe that love after losing a partner works differently. You don’t find it - it finds you.

You have to not hide in your house. Working for charities, the library, whatever interests you will make you more findable.

My best friend was widowed twenty years ago and has been waiting in her house for the right man to knock on her door. He hasn’t yet. Odds are he won’t.

I think it's going to be so much harder. Not least because I'm a tad cynical and suspicious now I'm older. I'm going to wonder why they are not already married at this age if not widowed too. I also know exactly what I want and I'm not going to tolerate less. Sorry you lost your husband too, hope you're doing ok. Xx

There are second chances.
They don't always play out the way we expect,
Everyone in the post 40 years will come with baggage and unhealable scars on their souls and hearts.
It's my experience that loving and kindness are not enough at this stage.
There needs to be understanding that holds no judgement on the things we do not understand.
There needs to be a sense of forgiving for the places inside the other human that we can't reach.
There needs to be an acceptance of the faults caused by rifts we cannot mend.
A knowledge that we cannot fill all the holes.

All of which needs to travel in both directions for it to work.

But YES, there are second, third, and even fourth chances for those that have an open heart, are willing and capable of love, and do not condemn a person based upon the scars and guilt that they carry with them as they trudge towards the reprieve of death.

Be Well
Live Happy
Keep Trying,
Rob

I was on my own for 18 years and did my best to start again but in the end i gave up. Then a woman came into my life and we are now married and very happy. It can and will happen to you. I am 66 and been married 5 years

I still love my ex. We were married for 25 years. I love her now as a sister. I believe she fills my heart where there is no room for a new love, but that is just me other people are probably different. I was just made with loyalty to one person.

It happens at any age. Second chance is much different then first. Some can get into easily. For some it is hard. There are many ifs and buts, plus there is always a doubt that if it will not work out. It can happen if you have patience and keep an open mind.
There are many widows and widowers like us who are looking for partners.
Just be optimist and cautious.
Good luck.

When i was in my forties, i had tried to reconnect with some old flames. 2 - to be precise. I was looking for some adventure amd excitement in life. Obviously both had moved on and had no space for me.
Less obviously, both though in their forties, had recently befriended their new loves.
Just shows that there are always possibilities. Be patient. Keep trying.

I'm divorced and I've at least found someone who's interested. Long term love is to be determined.

It's no different for men. Divorced in forties, 59 now and been on one date. I'm ok being alone, as with God with how I understand him I'm never really alone. Plus side is no drama, no nagging, no cheaters, no finance disagreements and I get to chart my own course.

It is definitely more difficult finding love again, especially at our age. It took me several years before I felt like trying to date again. In my case, once my wife passed, a big part of me died too. It took time to heal. Yes, it was a very lonely time. Still is.

You stop living when you think too much negative ,just roll with what life gives you and you shall be better off ..how many dating apps did you try?How many singles bars did you try ? Did you try and catch up with old school mates who are single ..theirs a will their will be a way ..

I was divorced at 58. My current wife was 47 at the time and widowed.

I found it very easy to meet women. I’d assume you’d find the same with men. The dating game itself is much easier. Everyone is aware of their flaws and idiosyncrasies. The perfection that the youth expect is a joke.

Just put in some effort if you’re going to put together an online dating profile. I had great luck with paid sites. Nobody is going to pay that’s not interested because too many “free” sites are available. It the better way to go about things if you’re interested in a LTR.

I know a married couple who met at a grief support group.

They have framed photos of their deceased spouses next to each other on a shelf in their home.

A lover is one who knows how to love. Someone who doesn't know how to love another, won't even get a chance. So what is doubtful is the first chance you got and whether it was love.

Who you actually want is a companion and not a lover.

There is no such thing as a single or divorcee or widow for love.

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Experience is a choice of word, since you are yet to experience true love. It's just your belief system which makes you think so.

Life doesn’t end at forty-five,
the heart still dreams, the soul’s alive.
Love may come in softer ways,
with deeper roots and calmer days.

Keep your heart young, open, true,
there’s still so much meant for you.
Time won’t stop what’s meant to start
if hope still lives inside your heart.

Though not a widower, I lost my long-time partner.

I hope that love can be found again; even at my way past middle age.

Age is just one of many factors. A 34-year-old friend of mine just got engaged, but it's hardly because she doesn't have much to offer. It could be because she's picky, but I think it has a lot more to do with her being too introverted

I've seen it work for several people. I wouldn't call it 'easy' and certainly not a sure thing, but it can and does happen.

As we get older our bodies fall apart slowly, but if we take care of it, get lots of exercise and eat right we can delay that.
First impressions are important and if you look good someone will notice.
If you choose to sit at home drinking, smoking and watching TV then yea, you will be single forever.

Leaving a long term marriage and wondering the same things. We'll see what life brings ..

My mom’s friend got remarried at 80+ so..

It's very possible
I have known many widowers finding partners

i would like to say it will be easy but it is not. i remember being in that age group and the men were into the young women. now at 70, it is even harder than ever

Well, if you take care of yourself and you’re attractive there’s no reason to think your life is over. But if the marriage made you complacent and you gained a lot of weight and let yourself go well then yeah you’re pretty much well finished.

Don’t give up, it is very possible and will happen when you least expect it.

All depends what your looking for
If your trying to replace what you had you'll never find anything
When your looking you tend to NOT find the right fit
Do you need companionship
Do you need sex
What do you need/ desire

I have my fingers crossed for you

Not that difficult, if you know what you're looking for. The Internet made it even easier.