Losing the Will to Try

I am sharing this just to clear my head.

Lately, interactions exhaust me.
I stop midway and disengage.
Everything feels pointless.

Sometimes I feel the urge to fight harder or prove something.
Then my mind cuts in and asks, “What’s the point?”

I feel like I am moving without direction.

Even effort feels expensive, and giving up feels easier.
But I feel wounded by my very act of self-preservation.

Have you ever reached a point where even trying felt meaningless?

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VampireQueen · 26-30, F

All the time.

I gave up on making new friends and on dating.

Nearly every friendship I’ve had ended in them betraying my trust.

I went through a horrible break up with my ex fiancé a few years ago. It cost me everything. My friends, my home.

For the last few years I’ve lived in a sort of exile. Alone in a new house never talking to others. It is lonely and painful but at least the pain is my own doing.

I wish I could get out of it and meet new people who genuinely care about me. But that isn’t how life works.