You can do this. You must just take your time. The reason you can't figure things out is because you are in the situation itself and are not able to step outside your thinking to analyze things correctly. However, it is possible to untangle your thoughts. I'm hearing you say the following:
It seems like you're struggling with feelings of resentment and frustration, stemming from a sense of being taken for granted and not having your emotional needs met in your relationships. You're aware that you're complacent and that you need to make changes, but you're unsure about how to take action.
One potential issue might be that you're prioritizing others' needs over your own, leading to burnout and resentment. You might benefit from setting boundaries and communicating your needs more clearly. Additionally, you seem to be aware of your own patterns and are taking steps to acknowledge and process your emotions, which is a positive start.
It's also possible that you're struggling with self-doubt and feeling stuck, which can make it challenging to make changes. You might benefit from exploring your values and goals, and identifying small steps you can take to start making progress.
Ultimately, it seems like you're looking for a sense of connection and empathy, and are struggling to find it in your current relationships. You might benefit from seeking out supportive relationships or communities where you can feel seen and heard.
Untangling thoughts can be challenging, but one approach is to start by writing down your thoughts and feelings. This can help you identify patterns and gain clarity. You can also try breaking down complex issues into smaller, more manageable parts, and focusing on one thing at a time. What I do is engage my mind to think objectively, staying neutral to the situation to begin with if I'm going to untangle things. Then I make a list of the pros and cons of what I'm feeling. I make a list of everything I'm feeling whether positive or negative about a certain situation. In this way you can make and informed decision as what you should do. This is the very best way to do things and it has always worked for me and it's not hard. It is very therapeutic and in this way you can get a clear picture of what's really going on when you're completely truthful with yourself and haven't made a decision one way or the other until you go through all these things and and analyze them. It's a wonderful method. But you must be willing to tell yourself the truth, because the truth will always set you free. You must also be willing to make the necessary changes. After all, that's what this exercise is for, to untangle things and get your life straightened out again so it is very necessary to do your homework and I always say if you love yourself and respect yourself, you will embrace the homework and not look at it as something you dread. It's not. It is not a life or death situation. It is a temporary situation and God is trying to tell you that changes now need to be made to your life in order to get it in order, where it should be. He's trying to help you straighten your life out and until you do this exercise for yourself, you'll stay suck. Change is a good thing. Problems are not there to hurt you. They are there simply to show you that there's something in your life that needs changing. Then as you make the change or changes, you can move on in life. However, until you address these problems and be honest with yourself, you may go on to step seven or eight or nine or 10, but eventually that problem is going to come back no matter what because you have not resolved it. Instead you ran from it and you cannot do that. Once you take care of the problem, then it's okay to move on to step two three and four. If you do not, you was just a miserable and in the same spot until it is resolved. That is the order of things in life. Something definitely needs changing in your life and I would say even desperately. If you are not being true to yourself and your own emotions, that means you're being a people pleaser and God did not make us to be people pleasers. The first goal in life should be to love and respect yourself, no matter what, and not let others walk all over you. It is a must. Nothing in this universe says we have to allow people to take advantage of us. Your problem is boundaries. You have not set personal boundaries and therefore people step over them. You teach people how to treat you. The sooner you learn that the better. If someone steps over your boundaries and you allow that, you're being untrue to yourself and your teaching that person that you don't feel you are important enough to keep your boundaries and be true to yourself. In that case you lose their respect. It's crucial to keep your boundaries and not let anyone step over them. You are in this situation because you either have no boundaries or you have allowed others to step over them. You do not let people step over your personal boundaries. Not if you want to be happy. Fix that and you have fixed a lot. When you don't, people don't believe you. They just think well that's what they said but they don't really mean it and you can't get anywhere like that. It's important that people show you respect because you deserve it, you're worth it, and you're enough! And even at first if you don't believe that, practice it everyday anyway until you do come to believe it. Until you do start to believe in yourself. That's what people who love themselves, do.
Another approach is to practice mindfulness and self-compassion. This can help you stay present and focused, rather than getting caught up in negative thought patterns. You might also consider seeking out support from a therapist or counselor, who can help you work through your thoughts and feelings in a safe and supportive environment.
In terms of getting out of the tangled mess, it might be helpful to start by setting small, achievable goals for yourself. This can help you build momentum and confidence, and make it easier to tackle bigger challenges. You might also consider seeking out supportive relationships or communities, where you can feel seen and heard.
It's also important to remember that untangling thoughts and emotions takes time and patience. It's okay to take things one step at a time, and to focus on making progress, rather than achieving perfection or rushing things. These are things that must not be rushed, but practiced gently and be loving to yourself. This is something that can definitely be achieved. Something you can definitely do. When you put your foot down and say what you mean and mean what you say, people take notice and it's only then they start respecting you. But no one will, until you take steps to take back your power. I wish you the best and I know for a fact you can do this. It's in you. You already have all the tools you need. You just need to practice using them. You're already a winner no matter what anyone says. No one is any better than you. Find a friend that appreciates you for you, and not what they want you to be. Every human being deserves that.
