Can someone snap me out of my habits?
I caught myself again indulging in imagining a grand monologue about telling this girl off and how much she had hurt me and how worthless she made me feel, even though we hadn't had a proper interaction in maybe 2 years (more information in my previous posts).
It's come to a point that I become irrationally irritated and angry at seeing her around, even though the events that had happened before was not entirely her fault, and more as a result of my own insecurities piling up along with past events related to her. I realized that this can't be healthy for me to always be thinking about this to the point that it's almost like background music to my daily life for months. I don't think I'll be able to talk to her about this as we haven't been talking for years, and alot of me still feels so much physical anxiety and hurt just standing in proximity to her.
I know all this ruminating is bad, but all I need is somebody to just tell me to snap out of it, get my head out of my ass, and move on. I can't go on like this especially with the new years rolling around.
It's come to a point that I become irrationally irritated and angry at seeing her around, even though the events that had happened before was not entirely her fault, and more as a result of my own insecurities piling up along with past events related to her. I realized that this can't be healthy for me to always be thinking about this to the point that it's almost like background music to my daily life for months. I don't think I'll be able to talk to her about this as we haven't been talking for years, and alot of me still feels so much physical anxiety and hurt just standing in proximity to her.
I know all this ruminating is bad, but all I need is somebody to just tell me to snap out of it, get my head out of my ass, and move on. I can't go on like this especially with the new years rolling around.
