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please give opinion of what should I do

half of my friends are struggling in mental health and I do too, i try my best to care for them and comfort them, leading me to comforting atleast 5 people per day (even strangers). Im a bit tired of it but its preventing people from suicide, yet making my thoughts go on stronger. I want to reach out to my friends but theyre also struggling in the process and I dont want to make their problems even harder. So, I bottled up my feelings and let strangers and friends whos struggling vent to me. I also keep up with my cheerful personality, and being dry is SO NOT me at all and they will question me a lot. My suicidal thoughts getting stronger each day, but im trying my hard to comfort people and be there for them. What should I do to make my thoughts get less?
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WillaKissing · 56-60, M
Do you have a social worker or any kind of free mental health clinic you can go to?

You are at a point where you are going to have to put yourself first.