What does it feel like living a life where you aren't lonely?

I wonder often, would I be happier if I had people to talk to? I try so hard to make friends and talk to people and it's all great when I'm the one starting conversations, yet if I don't text first it's like I don't even exist. I don't go out anywhere, I stay in my room and rot in my bed feeling like there's something heavy that makes me unable to move out of my bed and I hate that feeling. I spent new years alone and nobody even said anything. I talked to my friends when I was in school but now that it's break..nobody even talks to me anymore. I feel like a complete loser and I stay quiet for too long that it's became hard to speak clearly and I don't know what to do... I just want someone to talk to me and care...