Im not sure what to do…

So i moved back to my home country to be with my boyfriend, but ever since i came back things are not the same, we barely talk, he just seems to have shut me out of updates on his life, he has a new job and knocks off at 5, its hard to ever see him as my mum wont allow me to be out after 7,which makes things more difficult to bond and do stuff…so its hard to see him. I really do not know what to do. I did talk to him about how hes changed since i came back and he didnt respond. Before i came, we would be on the phone for over 4hrs a day,calls and texts all day long,, now i barely get a good morning. When i see him, hes so great, gives me attention, wants to laugh and chill but the minute i go back home he shuts down again. Im confused, annoyed, hurt that i dropped my life to be in this situation and i regret it. Now i cant afford to move back out again. Dealing with being treated like a child at home to being neglected by the person i came for. Im 33 btw.

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in10RjFox · M

Awful situation. I think it's better to lay your cards straight. Ask direct if he has any marriage plans or if you can seek alternatives. As you are already 33 no more time for contemplations.

Pinkdove74 · 31-35, F

@in10RjFox i did ask him directly, we were planning to married had all the excitement hence the decision to move back and cut the distance so we can better prepare. Now all that talk is gone.

in10RjFox · M

@Pinkdove74 sad. But go head on again and ask what happened to all the plans. Does your mom know about him and your marriage plans?

Pinkdove74 · 31-35, F

@in10RjFox she does, shes knows this guy very well and verballly vouches for my marriage to him

in10RjFox · M

@Pinkdove74 then get her to invite him home and settle the matter.

Pinkdove74 · 31-35, F

When i try and address stuff with her she says im disrespecting her house, im radical and i cant do as i please in her house,,,, btw i dont smoke, drink, party, no do i have 1000friends, i go to church and try to live a clean life. She had always bugged that im growing up i need to bring a guy home, now iv brought him, its this. If i go out with him till after 7 she calls and threatens and shouts that im disrespectful for coming late. So i just avoid going anywhere.

Pinkdove74 · 31-35, F

@in10RjFox he does come in when he drops me off and she always ‘jokingly’ passing snarl comments about late coming and dating. Which makes it cringe and uncomfortable

in10RjFox · M

@Pinkdove74 the problem now seems that you are already married to your mother and she is not letting you go. Maybe she has annoyed your guy with her rules. Have they been interacting while you were away?

Pinkdove74 · 31-35, F

@in10RjFox true, it does feel like im married to her….. yes, before i came they would hang out, go for lunch and stuff. She even pushed that he comes to visit often before i moved. She didnt mind him coming to stay with me but doesnt want me staying out late under her roof. I feel like shes forcing marriage

in10RjFox · M

@Pinkdove74 could be she doesn't want you getting pregnant before your marriage.

Pinkdove74 · 31-35, F

@in10RjFox then shes a hypocrite because she was fine and encouraging that he comes to visit me but now worried about a 33 yr old being pregnant under her roof