how do i get over him

we've been friends for years, and i developed a crush on him about 2 years ago. he made a move a few months ago, and we started dating, but i was struggling with body positivity and stuff so i told him i'd like to be friends. so i could learn to love myself. he proposed the idea of friends with benefits, and that's what we currently are. thing is i'm in love with him, and i love myself so i'm finally ready to date, but he wants to stay as friends. how do i get over him? i want to stay fwb cause it made me love myself.

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ViciDraco · 36-40, M

You tell him simply that you are going to start looking for a relationship. If he is not willing to be that person, then the benefits need to stop when you start seeing someone else. The risk of someone else having you may drive him to make a decision. Though it may not be the one you most want.

Ultimately he needs to either step up or step away to make room in your life for what you desire. You do not have to rush him, just communicate that you are seeking a committed partner and he can be that person or he can be a friend without benefits when you find that person. If he can't do either, I would question how good of a friend he is.