im just rambling atp, dont mind this one.

The moment you stop comparing and find your strengths + take responsibility and try to shift the things you dislike about yourself is the moment you begin to change your reality.

The moment you look at the neighbor's grass, you begin to live in the illusion that their life is perfect. Spoiler alert: it is not.

Every person struggles - your will and attitude is the defining factor.

Referring to what you said;

These are speculations - just trying to imagine other possible realities:

- Stop racing - maybe "everyone else" need to sprint.. do they even know where they're going? Maybe you are bound to stand a moment, look around, consciously choose your direction, then walk, then run. Perhaps you need more time to discover your path - it doesn't devalue your experience. It will take the time it needs - accept that and let go of your will to do it rapidly - you may miss out on many successes just by feeling too pressured to pay attention.

- You never know; the person that won the contest may have had their dark past full of pain and drawing may have been their obsession and their way to release trauma.
By pure luck, they won. Maybe they feel discouraged as well.. and maybe it is the only thing that returned their will to live on.

- The shy person may not realize that being too popular is not always best - everyone acting like they know you - being uncertain about who is sincere is exhausting!

- Some people talk, some people act, some people write, some dance, some do photography.. your way of expressing your emotion may be different - the message you want to convey is what counts. Do it your way - it is the only way to meet someone that actually gets you.

- Smile and laugh - make it your mission. Even in the toughest times in history, those who managed to make themselves and others smile/laugh fared better - it brings something good in everyone's lives, even if we did not realize our dreams yet - the path doesn't have to be only suffering... there are golden moments every day - seize them, if you don't see them, make them yourself and let them fill you with courage to take the next step in recreating the reality you want to live in.

I wish you to find your deepest potential and to practically invest it in your world.
Then, everything you said today, will seem like ancient faded scars that are an enriching part of your journey, but not your main essence.

Best 🦋

Discipline is better than talent; here's why:
Talent is taken as granted and puts people off-guard - that is your chance to shine.

Example:
One of my classmates in high school was an ace in math.
The whole class envied how he was always the best, solving everything with such ease, as if he wrote the book. I, on he other hand, was the art and languages type and math was difficult for me because I got confused in longer textual problems. Throughout the year, he passed exams without studying, I passed exams doing triple the work + extra exercises.

In the next school year, my math-ace classmate was downgraded to a lower level of math whereas I was unknowingly pushed from my teachers to the higher level.

What happened?

He did not give attention to finals and did not apply his discipline to prepare (even if he is master at it).

That is why, discipline and motivation is the next best thing to innate talent.

Of course, when talent meets discipline, magic happens and that is unbeatable.
However, that is rare - thus, if you want to be master at something, keep going forward, and continue building upon it every day. Maybe not today, but eventually, you will see improvement and you might just find yourself at the same level, if not higher than the talented artist who succeeded.

If he did, you can, too.
Find your way.

:)

Mine is somehow worse.. everyone loves being around you? Not me. I'm figuring out life, trapping it in decieving ways. But somehow, it always gets back to me. I'm not shy or quiet, have little friends and I have anger issues.. I don't like life I really don't. Despite having different scenarios.... we end up in the same place.

You are uniquely you. Pursue what you want If/when you are able. It’s your life. Hugs.