I feel like I'm too clingy for my own good

I don't think I'm happy in my relationship, but it's not for the reasons people might assume. My partner is wonderful. He's fantastic, even. He's never been abusive, and he's never been mean to me, never hurt me emotionally or physically, he treats me like an absolute king, and life is just perfect with him. But despite that, I get scared that I might be too in love with him. I always ask for affection, and I feel so attached to him, and I think it's too much. Whenever I realize I might be behaving too affectionately, I tend to back away, and I end up feeling bad whenever I DON'T give affection either. It's just so conflicting and I don't know what to do. How do I stop feeling so insecure about showing love?

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RubySoo · 56-60, F

Talk with him about it.. tell him exactly what youve told us in this post and between you maybe you will come up with ways to make you feel more secure.

Anonimusu · 22-25

@RubySoo I've tried to talk to him about it and the thing is, he's fully aware that I'm scared to show affection. It's kind of an imposter syndrome type of situation where it's like, "I know you love me, and I know you say you do every day, but do you really say that to make me feel better, because you actually mean it, or because you're hiding the fact that you actually hate me?". I just want to learn how to stop feeling so horrible. I was in two relationships before, one being okay and the other abusive, and they both ended with me getting cheated on with no explanation, so part of me just thinks constantly, "When is this one going to cheat on me or break up with me. You're bound to hurt me sooner or later, so I should stop loving you too much", but I don't want to think that way. I just need advice on how to control that mentality

BrokenAbyss

I agree, talk to him. If he’s as wonderful as you say, he will try to understand and likely help you through it.

MarkPaul · 26-30, M

Perhaps you enjoy being high maintenance.

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