My partner and I rarely have sex

Relationships are so difficult, I think, because we are around one another so much and become more familiar and tend to take each other for granted.
Maybe this goofy stuff can help in some way. I will just start writing and stop when my fingers go numb. :-)
When I was with my now ex-wife we had sex six or seven times a week for the entire 10 years we were together.
Sex was, what I considered, to be 1/3 of a relationship.
Family was 1/3. Money was 1/3 and sex.
Those can all be broken down into subsections but for now I will just stick to the basics.
So sex is a huge part of a relationship.
I also believe that a relationship isn't 50/50. It's 100/100.
If your partner is only giving 30% towards the relationship that is still 130% going in.
So not sure where that fits in just yet but I will continue.
When we had our first child we had to go six weeks without sex.
At the end of that six weeks she had to remind me that we liked having a lot of sex.
In six weeks my sex drive went to zero.
I guess I just got used to not having it really fast.
Then it happened again with our second and third child.
She didn't just have to remind me she had to be persistent for a couple of weeks.
I had to be reminded how much I liked sex. Seems weird huh??
So given the 100/100% and the 1/3 parts you have to find a way to re-initiate the sex as the major part it is.
I know... "Why do I have to do it?"
Someone has to and he apparently isn't able for what ever the reason or reasons.

I guess you should start out by initiating sexual stuff without expecting sex.
Don't want to put him in system shock. Yet. :-)
So like when you go to bed ... rub his chest and cuddle up to him. Do that for a few minutes and then kiss him goodnight and roll over and go to sleep.
Just make that a habit. Maybe once every three days to start with.
Then add in daily pats on the but. A little at a time remember.
Tell him you love him a little more and more.
Essentially it's up to you to lure him into the amount of sex you need.
So there is this part as well. The more excited he gets and stays the more baby gravy he will make. The more gravy he makes the bigger the house for the gravy gets. The bigger the house the more often it needs to be emptied. LOL.

Hope you can get some useful information from that drivel.

I’m in a similar situation with someone who gives all their energy to work and shifts blame constantly. In my situation I have no control of improving things so I just focus on my own happiness. Just know that you aren’t the problem here.

“Life is short, have an affair” 😂😂😂
On a serious note, he’s depressed and his sex drive is going down.
Some men can’t function properly when they worry that professional goals.
The thing is the more you push it or talk, the less horny he’ll get. It has to come from within himself. Find the kind of porn he watches, that will tell you a lot. Don’t try to compete with his porn though. It’ll just give you enough info to decide whether your relationship can be salvaged or not.
One trick, start cooking food that give him uncontrollable raging boners! 😂 or suggest he takes Cialis or viagra for recreation purposes 😂😂😂

Your partner is unwilling to compromise in your relationship, that's literally the nail in the coffin, your relationship is dying, if it's not already dead. If he wants any happiness from the continuation of your relationship then he has to start communicating. The main problem is that he is the one that needs to hear this, not you.

I can't tell you what to do but it's one thing if my metaphorical spouse told me they were having health issues but to tell me I don't smile or something just seems like a lame excuse and a cop out. I would sense that something else is going on and just leave them in all honesty. It's not that I would leave for lack of sex, I would leave for lack of honesty. That's just my opinion.

Time to move on. Start going out with your friends, dressing up, and looking nice. Dont settle !

He needs to see what he is about to lose. Because he will regret it when you leave him.

If you're not happy you should leave. People dont suddenly change.

It's been seven years for me... 🤷‍♀️

this is just hypothecally but maybe theres a reason about himself hes to ashamed to admit and thats why he doesnt want to do it? or maybe hes going through something that makes his libido go down? like depression or some mediccal condition

Sorry to hear

Maybe you should initiate something. Dress in sexy lingerie and wait for him to get home and find you. Seduce him. Im sure you could pull that off :)

That's weird .. he has someone else?