Do you believe everything happens FOR us, not TO us?

I do enjoy that perspective and quote that I have seen a few times. But one thing I truly GRAPPLE with, is how can
we /I consider daily, awful, horrendous and torturous abuse as something that is FOR us?

I am loving and giving and very intuitive most likely due to the inhuman life I had for decades. I do see how trauma can make one very empathic years later. But aside from that my life was ruined. My Self disintegrated. Feeling small, unworthy and as if I have no right to love. Severe anxiety issues and PTSD that makes me not trust people
and doubt myself too. I can't see how abuse could truly be for us. 😢

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SW-User

Life is about learning. Learning happens through lessons. Lessons repeat until we have grasped the core teaching of our experiences. These are in the way of hardships because complacency or stability isn't a motivator of growth.
There is a bigger picture, going into soul growth and ascension to which our life journey feeds into. I won't go into this right now.
Regardless of your beliefs on the soul level, at the life level it is about walking the journey (some call it the heros journey) and integrating all the parts of ourselves that have been defragmented, so we can find a wholeness in ourselves.
Unfortunately, until we heal and integrate, we will keep repeating these experiences in one form or another.