i am done... so done sorry my dear friends i wasnt strong enough..

Matthew 11:28-30 - Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

https://similarworlds.com/christianity/5073095-The-Bible-is-really-clear-on-salvation-Its-not-based-on-how

You are strong your one of the strongest people I know and you mean a lot to people including me please stay strong