What’s stopping you from wanting to die?

not much is keeping me around. I keep having hope and everything, but then it gets ripped apart, over and over again, and when I feel like things are going to work out, they keep falling apart, amongst the other things that could be mentioned, I have been on the edge of ending it for the last few years, but not as much as I have in the last few months. and I keep getting more reasons to not stick around, than I do get ones to stay, and leaving gets more and more appealing every time I lose a piece of myself.