My brother is dying...

My brother was diagnosed with a terminal brain cancer a little over a year ago. They tried treatment all this time and have decided he is ready for hospice care. I've been a spiritual person in the past. I've been through losing best friends and family members before. I'm just getting to a point where I'm angry at God. Not sure if there is a God per say. I grew up religious but my experiences have shown me both presence of a greater being and feeling so hopeless that it's easier to believe there's no greater being. Because what greater being what let these awful things happen to people who have lived their lives in the light. Maybe just getting this out but anyone else know how I feel?

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Thingscanonlygetbetter · 41-45, F

I too am the same .
Baptised a Catholic
Went to Catholic School . Had Religion drummed into me untill i was in high school.

My Mum n Dad Split up when i was 3 .
My Brother overdosed and died when i was 5.
Didnt have a good childhood . My Mum wasnt a nice person .
Went to live with my Dad at 12.
Cut to the chase.

When i was 30 my partner of 16 years was diagnosed with Cancer ,
I was full term pregnant with our 3rd child .
Whilst he underwent treatments , Opperations . And everything else that comes with this fucking horrible disease.
It spread . So more of the above .
This went on for about 3 years .
After id had my youngest , he was about 4 months old . I had a phonecall early morning to say my Dad had unexpectidly dropped dead .
I felt so alone .
And thats all it seems to be lately is people dieing . Parents burying there children ffs .
So i get it , i do , i also hate God with Avengence xxxx