Yes, I think it is possible but perspective plays a big role in it. Personally, I think that people who think emotions are well-controllable are somewhere on sociopathic spectrum, as the ability of this control is one of the trait of ASPD. Of course they don't have the disorder but they do not comprehend why some people can't control emotions or change them quickly at will. That's why these people believe that others simply don't try hard enough or that their emotions aren't genuine and people only use them to manipulate. At least that's what I believe. So no, I don't think everyone is responsible for the outcome or that it's their fault that they weren't able to thrive in life. Some people are just shit out of luck because of their genetics or life experiences that damaged their ability to process emotions and control impulses correctly. I think we should be compassionate but not enable and amplify their sense of self-pity.
Another thought:
I don't know why people have to operate with words like "is responsible for" or "is at fault for..". Unless they make their own problems someone else's problem too, why do people even need to comment on the lives and the decisions of the others?
It's like when a random dude comes to another person who overeats and tells them: "you're the victim of your own lack of self-control."
Really? Why do they even assume they identify as a victim of anything? If this person who overeats blames everyone else for it, then they are making their own problem a problem of other people too so that's different. But if it's just literally their own problem to deal with, why other people feel the need to meddle in?
People getting frustrated on behalf of someone else's problems are ridiculous, tbh. It's like they want to control the world and the lives of everyone else and think they have the answer for everything. Their mentality is like: "Omg, someone's unhappy. That's absolutely unacceptable. Fix your life right now."
I say...shit happens. You swim or you drown. It's sad not everyone can make it and live with rainbow and unicorns but such is life. All we need is to learn to be compassionate without enabling.
