I have this deep rooted sexual fear. How can I free myself from this ?

I've done a lot of things. But this is a persistent fear. I don't expect any man to actually being able to understand it. So I'm mostly asking women.
Any of you that's managed to break free from it ?
Or reduce it to a minimum ?
From my understanding, the moment I open myself up, it invites men.
So what I do is I keep myself lower, being less of my feminine, less of a female, so this isn't attracting them as much.
What am I supposed to be doing ? When I relax and simply be, I get guys attracted. And then the forces get into play and sooner or later they're trying to get closer but I don't want to. And then fear arises.

Maybe I'll need to wait another 20 years and I'll naturally be free from it ?
Can I be free from this ?

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samueltyler2 · 80-89, M

Can you verbalize what it is you feel? Is it actually the sex, or is it commitment?

being · 36-40, F

@samueltyler2 it is all that it brings. It is the act in itself and also the attachment or non attachment that brings afterwards..

samueltyler2 · 80-89, M

@being is sex painful?

being · 36-40, F

@samueltyler2 no, physically I enjoy it. But it messes me up emotionally afterwards.
Even I cannot fully understand and explain it.
That's why I was hoping for female guidance.

being · 36-40, F

@samueltyler2 mentally too, it changes the dynamics and my balance so much

samueltyler2 · 80-89, M

@being maybe it would be better to seek professional advice and not SW amateurs.

being · 36-40, F

@samueltyler2 haha no such option now

being · 36-40, F

@samueltyler2 also, on the path I'm on, I'm not convinced that western professional advice will do it for me.

samueltyler2 · 80-89, M

@being western?

being · 36-40, F

@samueltyler2 yes I mean, it could help most probably if I got involved in therapy for a couple of years but I don't see myself doing it for the time being..

Reflection2 · M

@being May be your aren't made for casual sex. You want it from a emotionally deep rooted connection with a man. It's same for me so I stay away.

samueltyler2 · 80-89, M

@being be careful with amateur advice.