Is there really such a thing as tough love
either between friends or parents or partners
or is it just an excuse for non-love and abuse
or is it just an excuse for non-love and abuse
26-30, F
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4meAndyou · F
There is when you are bringing up children. But a friend, a parent, or a partner is usually an adult, and adults have already been raised by their OWN parents.
An adult who decides to treat another adult as a child usually has a very serious reason for doing so...such as alcoholism, drug abuse, or criminal behavior. And that adult-on-adult tough love can all too easily slip into manipulation and control issues. So I am saying it is not too well thought out, and can actually be unwise and result in some serious resentment.
It is far better to distance yourself from people whom you perceive as requiring "tough love". If there is a mental health program that helps them to deal with their alcoholism, drug abuse, or criminal behavior, it's perfectly all right to let them know about it, and let them know that you THINK they would benefit from such a program...but then step back. Step WAY back and give that person enough respect to decide on his or her own whether he or she wants to be saved.
An adult who decides to treat another adult as a child usually has a very serious reason for doing so...such as alcoholism, drug abuse, or criminal behavior. And that adult-on-adult tough love can all too easily slip into manipulation and control issues. So I am saying it is not too well thought out, and can actually be unwise and result in some serious resentment.
It is far better to distance yourself from people whom you perceive as requiring "tough love". If there is a mental health program that helps them to deal with their alcoholism, drug abuse, or criminal behavior, it's perfectly all right to let them know about it, and let them know that you THINK they would benefit from such a program...but then step back. Step WAY back and give that person enough respect to decide on his or her own whether he or she wants to be saved.