If I talk to him, he'll end up calling the police, I'll get arrested and my life will be ruined. If I end it, at least the pain will stop. He might be able to help me out. He is the ONLY person who would be able to calm my mental state if he lets me apologise to him. So, what would you do?
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If telling him you are sorry and assuring him whatever you did or said won't happen again won't cut it, there is probably not anything else that would.