Don’t know where I stand.

I plan on taking hormones in November, but I don’t know if my marriage will last scared of the change, and having a hard time accepting 8 years may come to an abrupt end…. I don’t want that it’s why I stopped 2x now because I’m scared of change and cannot afford to live on my own because I depend on ssi, and it’s insurance to survive with my mental health and all, and honestly the only reason I am posting here now is I could really use some new friends and family, that’s all for now, thank you, and hope to hear more soon.