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lesbianism & gender confusion

Before I start, know that labels dont matter. I'm just trying to gain a deeper understanding of myself.

I came out as a trans man when I was 12 years old. I am now 20.
I have spent all of my adolesent life going by he/him and being seen entirely as male by my peers, but in the last 3 or so years I've been feeling an undoubtable draw towards lesbianism. Its like Its ingrained in my soul.
The thought of going by she/her makes me very uncomfortable, and Ive grown comfortable and happy with he/him and my masculine identity.
I'm just in such a confusing spot, it's like im caught in a rift between my gender expression and my sexual orientation. I want to be seen as masculine, I AM masculine, and yet I want to be someones sweet treasured girlfriend.
Am I a butch lesbian? Am I a he/him lesbian? I love the concept of he/him lesbianism. Do other women like he/him lesbians? Are he/him lesbians common and accepted within the lesbian community? Is there any hope for me? SOS
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Neoerectus · M
You are human. Saw an old term, epicene, in an older British novel which means both or neither, basically.

You love who you love how you love. Period. If labels cause you concern, why bother? Life is too short for stressing the little stuff.

BTW, Merriam Webster has a different, incorrect, definition for epicene ... look to Oxford English dictionary.