Struggles & Identity

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To all those who just don't get it!

*Scenerio for you* If a child was going into school as a boy (say 8 year old) let's call him Sam. Then say six months later he turned around and said he wanted to dress as a girl and be called Sarah. All his friends and peers have ONLY ever known him as Sam. Now you tell me how a school/ teachers then explain that to a classroom of 30+ children who are 7/8 years old? Then to a school of say 600 children who have 4/5 years olds in reception? WITHOUT causing confusion??? Love to hear how anyone here questioning my concerns, would tackle that situation to ensure EVERY child can FULLY understand how, why, Sam has changed!?

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Gloomy · F

Not every child needs to understand why, trans kids might not even understand why they are who they are at this point. What matters is that the kids should not bully her and be kind.

Also it's important to note that if Sarah is trans she didn't just "turn around" and even if it's just a phase the emphasis should be on acceptance and to prevent bullying.

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Lanie78 · 46-50, F

@Gloomy I agree she'd need to be accepted not bullied. No child should have to endure abuse. However you haven't answered my question.

Gloomy · F

@Lanie78 Sure I did
You asked how kids should understand why and how Sarah is there. and I say they don't need to explain those things in the first place. Stating that Sarah is here and that's ok is enough.

Now if you really want to explain it to kids there are simple ways that satsify their curiosity without "confusing" them. You underestimate childrens abillity to process information.

Lanie78 · 46-50, F

@Gloomy No I asked how does the school and teachers explain it to the children, some as young as 4, so not to cause confusion and upset? For some children they will be upset. Many cannot process changes very well.

Elessar · 26-30, M

@Lanie78 She replied, you didn't like the reply and are moving the goalpost.

Oh and rest assured that children have a much more flexible mind than yourself and can handle change much better than the avg conservative. Some of them more than others, exactly like adults. You're projecting your mental rigidity on them.

Lanie78 · 46-50, F

@Elessar I'm not projecting anything. Come back to me when you can interact in a respectful manner.

Gloomy · F

@Lanie78 You were talking about ages 8+ so nice you changed your narrative there.

Children understand the difference between men and women according to their gender expression by the ages of two or three, and they can identify themselves as a boy or a girl at that point.

In Sams case you could say "When Sam/Sarah was born it was automatically assumed that she was a boy, but once she was old enough to understand herself and explain it to us, she told us she's a girl. She now dresses in a way that makes her feel comfortable so that people see her as a girl. We use a girl's name and say she and her when we talk about her.”

Lanie78 · 46-50, F

@Gloomy Re read. I then went on to say how can you then explain it to 4//5 year olds in the same school. Why do people try and twist things?

Lanie78 · 46-50, F

@Gloomy Still it won't be enough for some children to understand. Have you children? Do you work with them?

Gloomy · F

@Lanie78 My answer still stands and it is quite unlikely that Sarah would interact with kids in a very different age category and it's not like there should be a whole school assembly to put Sarah in the spotlight

Elessar · 26-30, M

@Lanie78 Oh, you absolutely are. The question is whether you genuinely don't know, or if you assume we're just as dumb as your average conservative to fall for it.

And I haven't "disrespected" you anywhere, dude. If anything it's you calling people names ("sexist") when they call out the political narrative being pushed under a "I'm just here asking question" cover. Again, projection at its finest.

Gloomy · F

@Lanie78

Still it won't be enough for some children to understand.

Oh my god you do know that kids are learning and come in touch with new information on a daily basis. Some might be more difficult to understand like maybe a relative is deadly sick or kids feel the parents distress due to financial trouble, maybe they meet a kid with down syndrom who might also break what is considered a "norm"... but again kids are much less judgmental and confusion can be dealt with by simplistic yet good answers.

Lanie78 · 46-50, F

@Gloomy Right. What about children with autism? Other Neurodiverse children. Many of which are in mainstream schools. You've proven only that you don't think outside the box and for all possible situations/scenarios. I work with and have children. Clearly I have a better understanding than you.

Lanie78 · 46-50, F

@Elessar You're continuing to do so. I suggest you move on.

Gloomy · F

@Lanie78 What about kids with autism? They might face certain challenges too when interacting with other kids and expecting other kids to understand a little bit about autism isn't too much either

Gloomy · F

@Lanie78 I don’t have kids but a friend of mine is trans (i'm from Romania being trans is not easy here) and his little siblings have no issue accepting him for who he is and neither do their friends who have met him.

Elessar · 26-30, M

@Lanie78 I'll move on when I decide to move on, not before; this is a public forum and I'm fully entitled to comment on whatever comes up in my feed.

You can block me and create your very own conservative safe-space like many other far-righters here did before, if you really can't handle the criticism. Or even easier, move to Truth social or some platform where only your viewpoint is tolerated, and where you won't have to deal with any criticism so long as you continue to parrot the far-right.

Lanie78 · 46-50, F

@Gloomy That's good they're accepted. Still there are difficulties making everyone understand. Do you now see my point?

Gloomy · F

@Lanie78 I never denied that there are zero difficulties but like I mentioned no huge ones and like I said in my initial reply there doesn't need to be in depth understanding simply acceptance and no bullying

Lanie78 · 46-50, F

@Elessar You carry on making assumptions. You clearly aren't mature enough to discuss anything, really.

Elessar · 26-30, M

@Lanie78 Look who's making an ad-hominem and desperately trying to deflect now. ;)

No, I'm not making any assumptions here, merely pointing out the obvious.

Lanie78 · 46-50, F

@Gloomy Sadly it isn't that simple though. If schools have difficulty explaining it so every child can fully understand the changes so they then know not to bully, and single out that trans child, then sadly this society will always struggle to fully accept it. No-one should have to live in fear for how they choose to live.

Gloomy · F

@Lanie78 So you would support the creation of an age apropriate explanaiton to foster understanding and to combat bullying?

Still I think you single out the change of being trans. There are soo many changes kids have to deal with and I don't think kids need to understand everything in order to not hate something.
The mindset "I don't understand it but that’s ok"should have a place too.

Elessar · 26-30, M

@Gloomy Exactly. Evidently for these conservatives the very concept of NOT hating what they don't understand seem really alien.

iamonfire696 · 41-45, F

@Lanie78 If Society could just normalize it there would be no reason for all of this hate.

Just because you aren’t comfortable with it doesn’t mean it’s wrong. If there wasn’t so much hate and accusations around this subject there would be no big deal.

Kids are understanding but they are shaped by the values and ideals they are raised by. If that means to show hate towards a group of people then the hate keeps spreading.

Lanie78 · 46-50, F

@iamonfire696 I agree with you, however it's not wrong to question either.

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