Homosexuality: How did you know?

Sounds like a pretty stupid question, but how could you be 100% sure that you are, indeed, homosexual?

I'm currently debating this with myself. I've gone through straight-phases and gay-phases for many years. Sure, I could probably just slap the bisexual label on and be done but I'm now disgusted at the thought of heterosexual sex. The thought of lesbian sex excites me and gives me butterflies, without me even picturing a specific person. So... what gave it away, for you?

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Graylight · 51-55, F

God, but are we all hung up on labels these days. Gender, preferences, mental health, badges, gaming, career.

If you like a thing, then that's part of who you are; don't worry about that it makes you. A person who enjoys a variety of cultural foods doesn't identify as a Senegal/Jamaica-based pescatarian. He's simply a person who eats food.

When are you 100% sure? Some never are. Just roll with it, enjoy the ride, spread love and adventure and be safe.

RubyDragon · 36-40, F

@Graylight Thank you for your post. It makes sense. I guess the only reason I'd like to have "a label" is so that my attractions are simpler to explain to future, potential partners or even friends. I am hung up on labels and would go as far as saying I'm a little obsessive-compulsive about "naming" things.

Graylight · 51-55, F

@RubyDragon I know what you mean. I'm a bisexual woman married to another woman, yet I don't consider myself gay even though I'm committed to a woman. I use the word "fluid" a lot. Or I toss off the question with a clever remark.

If you think of sexuality of a spectrum, plotted with every possible stop, you might find yourself moving along that spectrum, back and forth, your whole life. I see it as a type of freedom to experience all life has to offer.

RubyDragon · 36-40, F

@Graylight Wonderful! I learned about the Kinsey scale on a site I used to frequent, and you mentioning the sexuality spectrum, made me think of it. I'd say I'm about a 4.5 to 5 on the Kinsey scale. (Predominantly homosexual, only incidentally heterosexual). So technically the bisexual label fits me best. But I mentally gag at the thought of doing anything sexual with men, although I only have experience with men. I don't know what made me lose sexual interest in men

Graylight · 51-55, F

@RubyDragon Well, they're men for one. But seriously, I love the term "incidentally heterosexual." I may have to start using that.

I use the term bisexual for the same reason. I mostly find women preferable, but for sport I can play another game, too. 😉

RubyDragon · 36-40, F

@Graylight How did I miss your reply?! Sooo sorry! I also love that description 😁