Have you ever had severe, extensive abuse in your past ?

So degrading, so insidious, sadistic etc... that you now feel you are not even a human being? Like you are a 'thing'? Like you somehow, (even though it wasn't your fault per se) don't deserve regular things, other normal people do? And that you are less, and tainted?
Anyone relate to those thoughts? If so, did you ever surpass these notions, or heal and overcome them?

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

JoyfulSilence · 51-55, M

Not too much.

But I was a socially awkward, intellectually gifted, nerdy kid, so peers picked on me a bit for that.

On the flip side, being nerdy and gifted gave me some pride. Once in history class we played a game with teams answering questions. My teammates quickly learned I knew my stuff, and deferred to me. Eventually the class caught on, and the class clown said, "How about everyone vs. Chris? [me]" At first I felt bad, but later felt pride, and it stuck with me.

And my skills opened doors and earned me money and now I secretly laugh at all those who pick on nerds, yet later in life end up poor or in jobs they hate where they do not have to think. And then they ask me for money. Nope. Being nerdy paid off, LOL!

So sorry you suffered and keep suffering. May the kindness of others be returned, since you are so kind.