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I Love Jokes And Riddles

"Right Now I'D Say He'S Sheepish."... The stockbroker's secretary answered his phone one morning. ...
"I'm sorry", she said, "Mr. Baker is on another line".

"Oh, I'd only like to know if he's bullish or bearish right now."

"He's talking to his wife", the secretary replied,

"Right now I'd say he's sheepish." ;)

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iamjames
ha ha!
A woman comes home and tells her husband, "Remember those headaches I've been having all these years? Well, they're gone."

"No more headaches?" the husband asks, "What happened?"

His wife replies, Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to stand in front of a mirror, stare at myself and repeat
"I do not Have a Headache;
I do not have a headache,

I do not have a headache.."

It Worked! The headaches are all gone."
The husband replies, "Well, that is wonderful."
His wife then says, "You know, you haven't been exactly a ball of Fire in the bedroom these last few years. Why don't you go see the Hypnotist and see if he can do anything for that?"

The husband agrees to try it

Following his appointment, the husband comes home, rips off his clothes, picks up his wife and carries her into the bedroom.

He puts her on the bed and says,
"Don't move, I'll be right back."

He goes into the Bathroom and comes back a few minutes later and jumps into bed and haves sex with his wife like never before..
His wife says, "Boy, that was wonderful!"

The husband says, "Don't move! I will be right back."
He goes back into the bathroom, comes back and round two was even better than the first time.

The wife sits up and her head is spinning.
Her husband again says,
"Don't move, I'll be right back."
.
....
.
With that, he goes back in the bathroom.
This time, his wife quietly follows him and there, in the Bathroom,
She sees him standing at the mirror and saying:
.
.
.
.
.
.
"She's not my Wife.
She's Not my wife.
She's not my wife..."

His funeral service will be held on Sunday.
http://www.experienceproject.com/stories/Love-Jokes-And-Riddles/2972015


:D
iamjames
A Blonde Goes To See Her Doctor For Her Regular Check Up.

Blonde: “I Think My Breast Is Full Of Water”

Doctor: “How Did You Figure That?”

Blonde: “Everytime A Guy Squeezes Them My Pussy Gets Wet“