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I Am Not the Person I Used to Be

Waaaay back when I was a little kid, I was, apparently, always really happy. Well that didn't (naughtyword)ing last very long. After numerous horrible experiences, I have come out on the other side depressed, scarred, pessimistic, and cynical.
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What you experience as you come out on the other side, doesn't sound bad at all. It sounds as though you're growing. It also sounds as thought you might be having depression, fear, pessimism, etc., as a defense against the aftermath of those numerous horrible experiences. The experiences are in the past. Can you let them go - forgive and forget?