What is the most pathetic excuse you've ever heard for not being able to get the milk out of the fridge?

@SageWanderer You moped the kitchen floor? What does that mean? How long does it take to mope a floor, I've never heard of that before.

@Bewilderbeeste No, my wife does it and then the kitchen is off limits for a while. She uses a sponge attached to a handle.

@SageWanderer Why does she have to mope though? Can't she be more cheerful?

@Bewilderbeeste She mopes when she scrubs the floor. So much for spell check!