You know you're in your mid 30s

When your outer thigh and butt hurts cause you slept in the wrong position. That or pervert ghost.

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I know, right? It's like:

Age 10: fall off bike, scrape skin off a large patch of your knee and elbow, then follow that up with falling out of a tree. Be just fine the next morning.

Age 30: "Oh, my God, every inch of my spine hurts. I must have slept funny."