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victim mentality is so toxic because if you truly believe you are a victim that suggests that

your circumstances are out of your control, therefore the ability to change your situation is perceived to be out of your control and it's someone else's fault. which isn't actually even true

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MiserableAtBest · 18-21, F

I think that at one point or another I thought this way as well.

Which is why I refrain from judging others who have experienced trauma and struggle with this mentality. It took me a lot of trial and error to finally accept help, I nearly destroyed my life beyond repair while at it. I assumed everyone was going to abuse me and take advantage of me, I expected the worst because of past experiences, and I put myself in a position where I was unable to feel joy and love in my own life.

And I must reinforce the fact that those feelings are completely VALID, and it takes a lot of work to break the cycle of continuous negativity, but it is absolutely necessary to break it in order to live a healthy and happy life. In that sense I agree with you 110%, but I do think it is important to acknowledge how difficult it is to break such a cycle, which is why we can’t put a time stamp on healing, because it’s a journey that vastly differs for everyone.