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Do you only tolerate certain people for one small reason?

Theres one guy I tolerate because he buys me beer sometimes. Other than that he irritates me

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Fernie · F

No wonder your life is a mess...you keep posting what a mess it is...what a lousy thing to do ...using someone for booze even though you can't stand him..NOT nice...I think Karma is kicking your butt because of that behavior.

Astro · 56-60, M

@Fernie I never make the best choices. Alcohol tends to lead me on a leash

Fernie · F

@Astro I really wish you would help yourself...you choose not to. Such a waste

Astro · 56-60, M

@Fernie you wouldn't be the first to describe my life as a waste. Just the other night someone was telling me to get sober, get a real job and stop wasting my talent.

Fernie · F

@Astro where did all this self loathing come from? Do you know? Have you ever looked into why you self destruct? I could only let go of my drinking when I found out why I was doing it

Astro · 56-60, M

@Fernie I'm not entirely sure but I think a lot of it has to do with not having a father, being bullied, growing up in a time where being gay wasn't accepted as much as it is today. A lifetime's worth of bad decisions. Not being happy with who I am. I always wished I was white. Never was happy with how I looked or was. Theres just a lot.

Fernie · F

@Astro You do have a lot of self awareness and you are not at ALL defensive...you are brave enough to look at yourself and not lie to yourself ...that requires a LOT of inner strength. I wish I could tell you what a horrible childhood I had...and I nearly killed myself with booze and isolation because of it...I am TELLING you that you can get past this and stop hating yourself.